The End is Near (Thank God)

I just saw myself in the mirror. REALLY saw myself. Holy shit. No wonder people pretty much daily ask if I'm carrying twins.

Could I possibly be carrying a 10+ pound baby? What the hell happened to me? Why do I look like an alien?

At my last doctor's appointment, she was even parading me around the office like a freak sideshow attraction, pointing to my stomach and saying, "Look at that!"

I'm thinking to myself, in two weeks or so things will be back to normal. I'll be able to fit into t-shirts and normal-size pants. The reality is it'll be awhile but at least I'll be able to fit in my "normal" maternity clothes - the maternity clothes that got me through the 9 months with Dally but stopped short at 6 months with Juan Pancho.

I just ate a really big burrito and now I feel sick.

Fall On Me (The Future Version)

I was looking up pumpkin pie recipes this morning. I can't wait until we get to that point where I have to make cupcakes and other assorted baked goods for the little dudes. I love this time of year and it's going to be THAT much better when the little hooligans are in school and they have all the classroom parties and holiday shows. I'm going to join the PTA just so I can hijack the Winter Show. Under my command, we'll rival Radio City.

I got big plans for the next 10 years.

Fall On Me

We're getting into the spirit of the fall. I think it's because we found the summer heat really aggravating. Today, we took Dally to a pumpkin patch and it was totally awesome - until Dally wanted to play on the ridiculously unsafe old tractor and John removed him from the insidious vehicle. During this endeavor, John received a solid size 6 Vans to the face. I saw it. I heard it. Sounded painful.

This morning, John suggested we dress Dally as Max from Where the Wild Things Are for Halloween. We already have a costume for Dally. He was going to be a giraffe. I was going to be Mother of Giraffe. But, suckered into the hipster hype of the upcoming movie, I now want to dress Dally as Max. And I'd be the Mother of Max who sends him to his room without dinner (not unlike Dally's real life).

John researched where we could get a Max costume and just found patterns and how-to instructions. Given last year's fiasco with the Yoda ears, this is not something I am remotely considering.

I went on eBay and saw costumes anywere from $70 to $250. I did find a pajama sleeper for $50. But A) Maybe there will be no Halloween this year (maybe I'll go into labor and deliver a pumpkin) and, more to the point, B) I'm a freakin cheapskate. I want the $15 version of Max, so it looks like I'll be Mother of Giraffe afterall.